March 2013
11 posts
3 tags
The New SU&SD Is Here
Paul: Back in January, we teased that we had something big coming. Teased.
It’s here.
Quinns: Everybody, please make your way to the new Shut Up & Sit Down site. Ah, no crowding! Form an orderly line! No rushing, people. Millicent! Calm down!
This site isn’t going anywhere, but updates will appear on the new one. Please update your bookmarks, friends. Safe journey.
4 tags
Games News! 25/03/13
Quinns: We’re used to board games testing our brains, reflexes, even our privates. But lungs? That’s a new one.
Enter Antoine Bauza’s Rampage, which should be landing this year. Bauza’s one of our favourite designers here at SU&SD, having crafted 7 Wonders and Ghost Stories, both of which are capable of collapsing your face into deep thought like a strong man might...
4 tags
Review: Tease
[Introducing friend of SU&SD and games journalist Leigh Alexander.]
Quinns: So here’s what happened. Leigh: OK. Quinns: A while back some SU&SD readers joked that we should review Tease: The Liberating Game for Couples and Groups. I got in touch with the PR Leigh: Oh, I’ll bet you did. Quinns: I GOT IN TOUCH WITH THE PR, who said she wasn’t sure they should send a game to a site that...
5 tags
SU&SD Present Their Favourite Team Games
Quinns: I’ve had this nagging thought for a month now, like someone left a window open in my skull. Why aren’t there more team games? Not co-op games, but games that let you bond with your friends both as a team and in hatred of your filthy opposition. Surely that’s the best thing ever?
I’m still figuring out who I can telephone to complain about this. In the meantime,...
4 tags
Games News! 18/03/13
Quinns: Ooh! Can’t touch this! Can’t touch this! You can’t touch the games news! It’s because it’s on the internet.
This was a great week for fans of salmon and runs thereof. Jesse Catron’s off-kilter fish racing game Salmon Run is now available for pre-order, including an expansion that adds dangerous fisherman hexagons.
Maybe you wanted something a...
4 tags
Our Belated Top 5 Games of 2012
Paul: How’s your tux?
Quinns: A little tight. How’s yours?
Paul: I went with the dress. It was cheaper. HELLO, ladies and gentlemen, boys and antiboys. It’s time for our top 5 games of 2012, which will almost certainly be as well-organised and halcyon as our top 10 Upcoming Games of 2012 feature, which ended up being 14 games, none of which we agreed on.
Quinns: Step this way, banishing all...
5 tags
The Fourth Ever SU&SD Podcast
Quinns: While iTunes and RSS feeds are beyond us, as the stars are beyond the humble antelope, I’ll tell you what! Paul and I can totally put a mic on a table and shout at it for 60 minutes.
Poor mic. Hit play!
Alternatively download the fourth SU&SD podcast right here!
That is, if you’d like to hear us talk about The Resistance: Avalon, the X-Wing Miniatures Game,...
5 tags
Games News! 11/03/13
Quinns: Fwsshh! It’s the weekly Games News, soaring into your life like a coment made of… news? Unlike a comet, though, Games News probably won’t kill you. It’ll just make you stronger.
This week was good news for fans of ships, starting with Gunship: First Strike!, pictured above. Successfully Kickstarted last year, it looks like this intimidating orgy of ships, cards...
4 tags
Your Guide to Space Cadets
Quinns: You know when you buy a game, and you know it’s going to be good… and it is?
Space Cadets is a game where 3-6 players fly a Star Trek-like space ship together in real time. That makes it a lot like SU&SD favourite Space Alert, but where that game compresses your flight (and the game’s jewel-like puzzle) into a brown-trousered 10 minutes, Space Cadets’ flight...
3 tags
Review: King of Tokyo
We have a new addition to team SU&SD! The newest since all those insufferable attention bandits appeared in our Twilight Imperium Let’s Play.
Everybody, please give a big, big welcome to Matt Lees. He’s got a review of plastic slugfest King of Tokyo for us. If you’ve ever thought “I’d be a really good Godzilla,” watch this video. Because you’re...
5 tags
Games News! 04/03/13
Quinns: Another week, another round up of games news! Give us your brain for a moment. We’re going to roll it down the carpeted staircase of what happened in board games this week. Starting with some Kickstarters you might want to get involved in![[MORE]]
Shut Up & Sit Down’s criteria for backing board game Kickstarters is simple. If, within seconds of opening your page, we...
February 2013
5 posts
4 tags
Review - Robinson Crusoe: Adventure on the Cursed...
You know when you buy a game, and you know it’s going to be good?
“This will be a great time,” you announce to your cactus or spouse. “I have been convinced by this game’s art and premise that I will enjoy myself.”
Your coat’s still on. You pick up the phone. “Barry?” You say. “It’s me. Would you like to come over and have a...
4 tags
Games News! 25/02/13
Quinns: Welcome to Games News, our new Monday morning feature. It’s now… 4pm, so it’s not morning anymore, but that’s OK, because this isn’t really news. Rather, it’s whatever hot reveals and dank announcements the SU&SD team have been excited by this week.
Don’t know what to be excited by in board gaming? Just follow our lead.[[MORE]]
This week...
3 tags
Opinion: Why Your Collection Needs Eurogames
Yes, we’re still working on something. You’d better be patient, it’s still some way away.
In the meantime, Quinns continues his dirty scribbling for the big videogame sites. He’s doing good work, though! Look here! Over on Kotaku he’s written about why big ol’ licensed games aren’t the beginning and end of board gaming. A balanced diet needs Eurogames,...
4 tags
Review: Skull & Roses
Quinns has written another Eurogamer review to tide you over until we return. If Tzolk’in was a huge, great club for your brain to wield, Skull & Roses is a rusty little shiv.
“Now, I could tell you that Skull & Roses is simple enough to teach to your grandmother or grandchildren. I could tell you that it’s exciting, tense and rich enough to retain even the most...
4 tags
Review: Tzolk'in
Here’s something to keep you guys hungry. Quinns has just posted his review of Tzolkin: The Mayan Calendar on Eurogamer, and it’s ONLY the most impressive game we’ve played this year.
“Getting worked up about mundane themes is a bit of a theme in itself in contemporary board gaming. Dyspeptic classic Thurn and Taxis is a good example: a game about running a 16th-century...
January 2013
2 posts
2 tags
Still working on that returning thing
“Return already,” cried eager commenter Kebabylon, on that last post, only today!
We’re working on it. Are we ever working on it.
In the meantime, Quinns has been busy writing about board games for other sites! Why not check out his games of 2012, his entirely deranged list of games to watch in 2013, or his review on Eurogamer of the Gears of War board game? Why, indeed.
4 tags
Shut Up & Sit Down Will Return
A lot of you have been asking “When’s the next video? The next podcast? Why the silence, SU&SD?”
We’re silent because we’re working harder than ever on something very, very big. Something every one of you guys will love.
We recommend you spend this time with your loved ones. Pull them close. Tell them how much you care. Sniff their cards. Run...
December 2012
3 posts
4 tags
Review: Fortress America
Quinns: Think to get flickering lasers and evil Empires you’d have to play the X-Wing Miniatures Game? Think again, mister! Or miss. Sorry miss. Paul: No, it’s me, I am a mist- Quinns: Say hello to Fortress: America (and imagine it responding to your greeting with an excitable 21 gun salute).The ENTIRE WORLD (made up of three players) is invading near-future America (controlled by one...
4 tags
Impressions: Neuroshima Hex!
Quinns: I’m meeting a lot of board gamers here in New York. It’s like Christmas, and I’m Santa, except they gift me with a game and only rarely sit on my lap and you know what this analogy doesn’t work at all
Today I was walked through WONDERFUL post-apocalyptic tactics game Neuroshima Hex!, released in 2006 and since expanded by a untidy bag of army packs. My friend...
4 tags
Review: Innovation
Quinns: The first edition of Innovation, a card game ranked in Board Game Geek’s top 150 games of ALL TIME, looks - as you can see - supernaturally boring.
The tiny box looks like it should contain soviet suppositories, and inside it you’ll find 110 cards in the same hospitalised colour (Lung? Nicotine?). The deathly manual informs you that every one of these cards is an...
November 2012
5 posts
4 tags
Review: Shadows over Camelot
Quinns: Oh god. OK.
Because board games age so goddamn well, running a board game site can be a bit like running a daycare centre. Those guys can’t rest because it might mean a kid getting stuck behind a radiator or someone eating a rock. We can’t rest because even if we stay on top of new games, we’re writing under the weight of every awesome game we’ve never played.
...
3 tags
Retrospective: Ambush!
Paul: Right then, shall we look inside a box that hasn’t been opened in at least sixteen years?[[MORE]]
You don’t get much variety in the commuter towns that sit at northernmost tip of Hampshire. They used to be villages, sometimes nothing more than pubs, but the growth of London and the reach of the automobile turned them into attractive settlements for those who worked in the...
4 tags
Review: Mission- Red Planet
Quinns: What are you doing RIGHT NOW? Swallow that food! Drop that baby! We’ve found a board game you should buy. It’s kind of what we do around here. Mission: Red Planet is a game of racing to colonise Mars in a congenial, steampunk fashion. 3-5 players jostle to load their tiny astronauts into ships on the launchpad board, these land them on the planet board, and you all try and dominate...
2 tags
Quinns is in America Again!
Looking good, Quinns!
Hello Shut Up & Sit Down fans! Quinns has gone back to the USA for work, once again sundering team SU&SD like an axe entering a grapefruit. He comes back to the UK on January 8th, at which point we’ll be returning to our business of assembling videos & podcasts for you guys. OUR guys.
Until then, you can enjoy us each doing written reviews, impressions...
5 tags
Review: City of Horror
Paul: It’s Hallowe’en! Well, it was Hallowe’en last night. Do you go in for Hallowe’en? I don’t, really. I don’t know if that’s because I’m from Hampshire or not. It’s just, you know, a time associated with throwaway seasonal tat and twenty drunk people all dressed as the same Heath Ledger Joker being sick on public transport—
Quinns:...
October 2012
5 posts
4 tags
SU&SD Present: The Board Game Golden Age
Hello! Last week Quinns gave a 40 minute talk at UK video game festival GameCity, designed to teach people about what’s happening in board games and why gamers the world over MUST get involved.
We recorded it, and you should check it out! It’s got all the evidence of why board game sales are rocketing up, three deadly arguments for you to borrow about why video gamers need to be...
4 tags
Review: Discworld - Ankh Morpork
Quinns: TWO games based on Terry Pratchett’s Discworld books have come out recently. Don’t worry, though. We’re here to guide you through this difficult time. There’s Guards! Guards! which we’ve heard is about as much fun as actually being arrested, but there’s also Discworld: Ankh-Morpork, which we heard is quite good! So we got it and played it. Isn’t that right, Paul? Paul: That’s right...
4 tags
Let's Play: Twilight Imperium
You asked for it, kiddos, and HERE IT IS. The Shut Up & Sit Down boys simply playing a game. Specifically, Twilight Imperium. The biggest, weirdest, most beautiful game in existence (played with not one, but both expansions).
Sit back, relax, and enjoy a tale of intrigue among the stars. Also, the touching story of a civilization of plants who REALLY don’t want high-speed internet...
4 tags
The very third Shut Up & Sit Down Podcast
Paul: Another podcast! It’s almost as if they’re becoming a completely irregular thing! Perhaps we’ll have to sort out an RSS feed so that we can sort out a iTunes thing so that we can sort out a WAIT A SECOND, you can just download the third podcast right here.
No, wait, it’s come to our attention that, on a few occasions, it’s not been entirely clear how you can...
4 tags
Review: Star Wars: X-Wing Miniatures Game
Quinns: BAAAA! Ba-da-baa! Ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba) ba-ba-da-ba ba baaaaaa… BA BA BA BAAAA. BAAA! Ba ba ba BAAA ba! Ba ba ba BAAAA ba! Ba-bam-ba-baaaa… That is me singing the STAR WARS theme. I am singing it for you. It is a special treat.
Fantasy Flight’s owned the Star Wars license for more than a year now, but all that’s meant...
September 2012
5 posts
4 tags
Medieval Strategy Week, Pt. 3: Virgin Queen
You guys have been fabulous, but it’s time to bring Medievaltimes week to a close with GMT Games’ incredible Virgin Queen. Remember we said A Few Acres of Snow was an amazing gateway wargame? This is your actual wargame.
Buy Virgin Queen now: UK / USA
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Medieval Strategy Week, Pt. 2: Warriors & Traders
Quinns: Paul and I were SUPER JAZZED about this one. Game of Thrones and Warrior Knights are great, but if there’s one thing they’re missing— well, it’s incest. But if there’s another thing, it’s building. They’re about managing a war, not a nation. Warriors & Traders is about ruling a nation. Better still, it lets you play the exact kind of game you want. Come! Climb aboard my...
3 tags
Medieval Strategy Week, Pt. 1: Warrior Knights
It’s Medieval Strategy Week here at SU&SD! And you know what that means. We hope you do, anyway, because we’ve got no idea. Anyway, here’s a review of the excellent Warrior Knights!(?)
Buy Warrior Knights now: UK / USA
5 tags
Season 2, Episode 5: The Summer Special
Some things are eternal. Love. Greed. The powerful board game reviews of SU&SD. The seasons. Is that it? I think that’s it.
In this, the grandest episode of SU&SD we’ve ever made, the boys do battle with their timeless nemesis: Summer. We’re looking at games that thrive with heat-tranquilised players. Grab a frosty beverage, shut up, and sit down.
03:34 - Mundus Novus...
2 tags
Teaser: S2E5
Neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet shall keep the boys from their games. Summer, though? Summer’s a dick.
Next week, the world’s hottest board game review will feel the heat. Bring a frosty beverage, and a couple of handkerchiefs. Seriously. Get ready to get clammy.
Music is B.W.O.J by The Dø.
August 2012
3 posts
3 tags
Impressions: August
Quinns: London’s enduring an apocalyptic heatwave right now. I’m typing this with ice cubes taped to my neck, and Paul is lying face-down on the floor. We’re trying to stay hydrated, but liquid just comes flying out of us with the velocity of a water pistol. Paul: I feel like a massive armpit. BUT it has been the perfect time to enjoy games in the sunshine. And then get bitten by everything,...
3 tags
Review: Hive
Paul: What is Hive? That sounds like some horrid illness, some terrible disease. “I’ve got Hive Pocket!” you shout down the telephone to your GP, sweaty hand gripping the receiver. Quinns: Paul, telephones are all mobile nowadays, and your GP will just tell you that Hive is a two player board game without a board. Paul: And then I would faint. [[MORE]]
Quinns: Hive is the first “abstract”...
4 tags
The We Are Back! Podcast, Because We Are Back
(Look, I tried to find pictures of us holding microphones, okay? OKAY?!)
Paul: Yep, that’s right, your eyes do not deceive you and nor do your ears. Shut Up & Sit Down is back and tightly, trimly encoded into a 64kbps podcast, streamlined for your pleasure and available for download right here. Just like your lunch break, it’s almost but not quite an hour long, far too...
July 2012
1 post
5 tags
Normal service will be resumed shortly
HELLO!
For personal reasons, Shut Up & Sit Down will be a bit quiet during July.
Quinns has flown to America to do some writing for a video game, while Paul is undercover researching his Pulitzer-destined article “Horses: What Do They Do When We’re Not Around?”
We’ve got an amazing August planned for you, though. I’m talking an exclusive review of a game that...
June 2012
3 posts
3 tags
Review: Cyclades - Hades
Paul: Cyclades! We turned SU&SD’s unblinking, cyclopic eye to look at it back in Episode 3 of this season. It’s a deadly, brilliant wargame where everybody plays different coloured Greeks trying to build two cities. Just two. Quinns: We’ll recommend it to anyone. Spartan rules envelope a design where everything anyone does is tragic, comic or heroic. The self-contained islands you duel...
3 tags
Review: 1960
Time for a new format! It’s a standalone video review, and what a review.
Sipping coffee, peering out from the windows of our White House (which is to say, a house containing two white people), we review 1960: The Making of the President. A fierce piece of design, a psychological wrestling match. And… predictably, the boys can’t agree on it.
GET IT TOGETHER, BOYS.
5 tags
Season 2, Episode 4: The Wizard Special
What ARE wizards? What do they do? What do they want?
No, seriously, we don’t know. In this featherweight episode of SU&SD, we explore that exact question. There are spills, chills, and yet more spills, board gaming being board gaming. You’d better get the cloth. YOU GET:
01:42 - Wiz-War review (Amazon link: UK/ US)
01:42 - Epic Spell Wars of the Battle Wizards: Duel at Mt....
May 2012
5 posts
2 tags
Teaser: S2E4
Poor, impressionable Quinns has been seduced. He is taken… and he forgets.
And what of Paul? Where is he? He has come to no harm, I hope.
Music is Good Morning, Captain by Slint.
4 tags
Guest review: Belfort
(Paul: Hey hey hey, what’s this? For a while Quinns and I were discussing the idea of guest reviews, where we ask certain particularly sexy contributors if they’d like to take a spot on the blog. For our very first, we’re delighted to host the excellent Ludocracy Now, a wonderful group of gamers who you may remember tried to muscle in on our last show. This time, we’re...
4 tags
Review: The Castles of Burgundy
Paul: Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Oh, Jesus! That looks like the lovechild of a maths textbook and hotel room art. I’m not having that in my house.”
Hold on. The Castles of Burgundy, which casts 2-4 players as the holders of estates in medieval France, has the whole board game community bleating with quiet joy. We absolutely had to get hold of a copy and try it out. You know...
4 tags
The "Podcast"
Paul: What is this?! Why, it’s the Shut Up & Sit Down Podcast! And it’s also available right here as an mp3. At last, you can enjoy SU&SD while shelling crabs, or during an exceptionally banal bout of lovemaking.
As our chat bubbles (and meanders) like a mountain stream, we touch on games we haven’t reviewed yet (and why), some of our viewer responses, beautiful...
3 tags
Impressions: April
Quinns: We’re trying a new format! Sometimes Paul and I don’t have time to assemble a true, riotous review, but we are always playing new games, our bodies like a pair of unreliable steam engines powered by a smouldering pile of cardstock. So how about this: a quick’n’dirty roundup of the best games we tried last month.
Click on through, then, for some impressions of...
April 2012
3 posts
3 tags
Season 2, Episode 3: The Show
Following literally hours of preparation and filming, the night of SU&SD’s television debut is upon us. There’s just one problem. The boys have to get home first.
Come with us, noble viewer, on a journey through the darkest ventricle of London’s black heart. Or just come for the board game reviews. We’ve got loads of them!
02:25 - The Walking Dead: The Board Game...
4 tags
Teaser: "The Show"
Season 2, Episode 3 is upon us, and… what’s this? Are the boys trapped in a deadly game, forced to play for their very lives?
That doesn’t sound like much fun. We’d expect a negative review, if we were you.
(The music is War Drums by Quakers.)
